What is expected of people today: a psychological treatment

In this Prishtina Talks presentation, Agron Terziqi — imam and psychologist, and an active contributor to the events and the running of Prishtina Talks — takes up in depth one of the most tangible psychological phenomena of our time: the expectations placed on people today, and what they do to mental health.

Terziqi begins by making clear that expectations change with the times and with the generations — our generation carries expectations quite unlike those of our parents or our grandparents, and that change is not neutral. In the modernity and post-modernity of today, expectations are built and imposed from outside, through the media, social networks, marketing and the standards society sets for “success” — and when a person fails to meet those imposed expectations, the result is often anxiety, depression and a crisis of identity.

In the central part, Terziqi looks at how expectations differ by gender (a man who raises his voice in anger is seen quite differently from a woman doing the same), by role within the family (what parents expect of a fourteen or fifteen year old), and through social media, which show only other people's “perfect lives”. He describes why reading about the lives of the famous online so often ends in depression — because we compare the whole of our own reality with the curated surface of someone else's.

The lecture closes with his practical approach: how to learn to tell our authentic expectations from the imposed ones, how to occupy the mind with something meaningful, and why building a life on personal values rather than on other people's standards is the only road to lasting mental health in the present age.

Some of the points covered: 📌 Expectations change with the generations and with the times 📌 Modernity and post-modernity: the imposed expectations 📌 Media, social networks and marketing as makers of expectation 📌 The psychological consequences: anxiety, depression, a crisis of identity 📌 The difference between what is expected of a man and of a woman 📌 Comparison with other people's “perfect lives” online 📌 Telling authentic expectations apart from imposed ones 📌 Building a life on personal values

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